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Being all slackers, we were always at a loss on the best way of not really spending any time together. I mean, you can only sit around, pretending you're in the same room together, talking shit and philosophy so much until you make Duckman look like a funny cartoon character. We had to just stop popping the Jeno's pizzas in the oven for 8 to 11 minutes and figure out a way of getting out of the house, still doing nothing, while only technically being together.
A couple ideas, then someone mentioned voting, and I thought "Yeah!" I really don't know why no one thought of it before, but then I thought, because it was an accident, my thinking: it was obvious. Thinking requires thought requires a spark. A spark usually tells you that some hammer has hit some metal object, in or out of your head, and thereby the conclusion is reached that thinking requires effort. The effort. Well, after all that, I was really shanked out, but still managed to pile my sorry butt into the car which was an automatic.
Jeff had a car phone. So while driving, since he had to do something anyway, he called up a couple people. It took a few dollars worth of cellular magic to explain that we weren't all just pissing our theory around. We were all going to go vote for President. Well, it caused a lot of laughter, many rustled bags of Ranch Ruffles from the other end (Jeff said), but in the end everyone got the point.
Wrote my name in the blank, checked the box, parted the curtains, sat there in the fabric out in the waiting hall. Now I felt great. And each one of the guys that came in to take up some space in the tiny seat with me had a smile, I had to add it to my own. We got all together again, and then we were laughing. The pollers inside didn't know what to make of us. I didn't care. None of us did. We were hungry for Jeno's.
So we were watching tv? Eating pizza, and one guy had got a box of the pizza rolls, so we each got one, saving it to savor for last, and the news came on, and it was Really weird. I felt whacked. Sick. I mean, I was the President now! And I must've had more friends than I thought.
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To register there was no parking space. We'd gone into downtown, across from the indoor mall, because there wasn't any other place in town to us. Pooling, we managed the enclosed car park bill a couple of streets away, and by the time we managed our name brands down to the place of worship, the whole government hall was a really half-full cup of coffee.
Great not having to stand in line, but it felt weird too. I didn't like it. I complained all the way to the booth, because I believe that you can't buy a movie ticket unless you're behind 20 other people, otherwise you feel socially naked, but no one listened to me. There was a guard on duty, but I mean just being on Duty bent against everything I didn't really stand for. You're a slack-ass, you can't even stand for what you believe in. Defeats the whole purpose, you know?
So here I was, voting. It was a trip. I was laughing the whole time. This was great! What to do, what to do, what to do, what to - I was looking over the white paper. White men's names, didn't recognize a one, a two, a - ah, fuck, it took too much time to count the faggots. But the last name really interested me a lot. It was a dude called Write-In, and I felt pretty whacked. I was laughing so Hard...!